Happiness is the interval between periods of unhappiness.

Pity the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.

By the time a bartender knows what drink a man will have before he orders, there is little else about him worth knowing.

Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.

Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.

Punctuality is one of the cardinal business virtues: always insist on it in your subordinates.

When a man tells you that he got rich through hard work, ask him: 'Whose?'

Publishing a volume of verse is like dropping a rose petal down the Grand Canyon and waiting for the echo.

A pessimist is a person who has had to listen to too many optimists.

The chief obstacle to the progress of the human race is the human race.

A fierce unrest seethes at the core, of all existing things:, it was the eager wish to soar, that gave the gods their wings.

Be sure that Satan will tempt you at your weak point, not the strong.

The team takes on the identity of its top payers... I don't want to take anything away from the Capitals offensively.

I put one on the turntable and when the needle dropped, I was stunned - didn't know whether I was stoned or straight.

If popular culture has taught us anything, it is that someday mankind must face and destroy the growing robot menace.

It's the great mystery of human life that old grief passes gradually into quiet tender joy.

The sky is one whole, the water another; and between those two infinities the soul of man is in loneliness.

I love the freedoms we got in this country, I appreciate your freedom to burn your flag if you want to, but I really appreciate my right to bear arms so I can shoot you if you try to burn mine.

You want the bad news, or the really bad news? (Eros) Oh, let’s see…how about we make my day special, and start with the worst, then work our way up? (Julian)

First rule of writing: When still a child, make sure you read a lot of books. Spend more time doing this than anything else.