Hark, the Herald Tribune sings, Advertising wondrous things!

Life is like a piano. What you get out of it depends on how you play it.

Once the rockets are up, who cares where they come down ? That's not my department.

I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man, and I hate people like that!

If I can't get people to commit themselves on whether or not there is a square root of two, then I won't touch on God or anything here

I feel that if a person has problems communicating the very least he can do is to shut up.

Political satire became obsolete when they awarded Henry Kissinger the Nobel Peace Prize.

On my income tax 1040 it says 'Check this box if you are blind.' I wanted to put a check mark about three inches away.

It is a sobering thought that when Mozart was my age, he had been dead for two years.

I went from adolescence to senility, trying to bypass maturity.

Always predict the worst, and you'll be hailed as a prophet.

I hate to complain...No one is without difficulties, whether in high or low life, and every person knows best where their own shoe pinches.

As long as politics is the shadow of big business, the attenuation of the shadow will not change the substance.

Your suffering only matters if it connects you to the suffering of others, if it heals them too.

When you are told that science has disproved the Bible, ask specifically where such is the case. True science and a true understanding of the Bible are never at variance.

Never allow anyone who has not invested in you to define you. You always need to see proof of a Return on Investment.

Heaven is the place where the donkey finally catches up with his carrot: hell is the eternity while he waits for it.

Talking nice about sun and wind and green jobs is just greenwash.

I don't care what sport you're talking about. What you see with great franchises is structure - a structure that doesn't just take you from year to year, but day to day.

When Pakistani Foreign Minister Hina Rabbani Khar was asked why there was so much animosity in her country towards the United States, she gave a one-word answer: “drones.”

I encounter millions of bodies in my life; of these millions, I may desire some hundreds; but of these hundreds, I love only one.