He was determined to discover the underlying logic behind the universe. Which was going to be hard, because there wasn't one.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

You don't have to become what you already are, which is a relief.

You can tell if a person is organized by checking his desktop.

The first trip of the Pony Express was made in ten days - an average of two hundred miles a day. But we soon began stretching our riders and making better time.

The world to come must be composed of what is past. No other material is at hand.

I thought we came out with too much respect at the beginning of the game and were on our heels instead of coming out attacking the way we did the last few games without Ricky and Kevin.

Today, nobody cares about European culture. We have a tradition, a vision, a culture of the past, we have legacy, but we don't have a present culture and we don't have a future.

no one bears witness for the witness

I don't like gossip stories. Facts are okay. But when gossips begin making items, that's something else again.

Art should be a place of hope.

Nightmares are releases.