He was white and shaken, like a dry martini.

Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum.

There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.

There is no surer foundation for a beautiful friendship than a mutual taste in literature.

It is never difficult to distinguish between a Scotsman with a grievance and a ray of sunshine.

I always advise people never to give advice.

The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun.

Gussie, a glutton for punishment, stared at himself in the mirror.

It was my Uncle George who discovered that alcohol was a food well in advance of modern medical thought.

As we grow older and realize more clearly the limitations of human happiness, we come to see that the only real and abiding pleasure in life is to give pleasure to other people.

The voice of Love seemed to call to me, but it was a wrong number.

Icy fingers walked down my spine, and I realized I was trembling. I wanted this to stop. Wanted Jas to stop before he made this whole situation a million times worse, but I couldn’t speak.

There are only three things that can kill a farmer: lightning, rolling over in a tractor, and old age.

When you think about the day-to-day, positive impact on the lives of U.S. citizens, there is no relationship that we have in the world that is more important than our relationship with Canada.

What's the use of worrying? It never was worth while, So pack up your troubles in your old kit-bag, And smile, smile, smile.

Those who run to long words are mainly the unskillful and tasteless; they confuse pomposity with dignity, flaccidity with ease, and bulk with force.

The conscience is more wise than science.

Perhaps the world progresses not by maturing, but by being in a permanent state of adolescence, of thrilled discovery.

Whether it is a simulated experience or a dream, the information that exists is all real... and an illusion at the same time.

In the space of a decade, China and India have emerged as dramatic, dynamic competitors.

I hate the French because they are all slaves and wear wooden shoes.