He won’t stop the war until you give him the peace prize.

You want freedom and they give you chicken korma.

Get some sleep, Secretary General, get some sleep. Revolution can wait till the morning.

Make good choices and always do your best.

A humorist tells himself every morning, "I hope it's going to be a rough day." When things are going well, it's much harder to make the right jokes.

A lot of rumours on the Internet are wrong and horrible.

I'm no angel if that's what you thought you found. I was just the victim of a man that let me down.

Everyone thinks I'm a hypochondriac. It makes me sick.

Adversity often hatches out the true nobility of character.

How lucky we are that we love each other so much that we burst into three pieces.

True piety lies rather in the power to contemplate the universe with a quiet mind.

Don't play the notes. Play the meaning of the notes.

I'm not small, I'm space-efficient.