Hear the birds? Sometimes I like to pretend that I'm deaf and I try to imagine what it's like not to be able to hear them. It's not that bad.

Anyone can be confident with a full head of hair. But a confident bald man - there's your diamond in the rough.

Even though the National Guard and Army Reserve see combat today, it rankles me that people assume it was some kind of waltz in the park back then.

Being Larry David on Curb Your Enthusiasm was the best thing to happen to Larry David in life.

Give a guy a girlfriend and a great job, he doesn’t need therapy.

I’d rather have the thieves than the neighbors - the thieves don't impose. Thieves just want your things, neighbors want your time.

Women love a self-confident bald man.

Sometimes you have to wander a bit, and do what you don't want to in order to figure out what it is you're supposed to do.

Switzerland is a place where they don't like to fight, so they get people to do their fighting for them while they ski and eat chocolate.

I had a job as a paralegal. I drove a cab.

A date is an experience you have with another person that makes you appreciate being alone

Good literature is a lifeboat! Every time you feel you are sinking, jump on it!

Our social and political tasks, if we take them seriously, loom larger than life. Yet infinite responsibility destroys a human being because he is only a man and not god." ~ p.23

There is little difference in people, but that little difference makes a big difference. The little difference is attitude. The big difference is whether it is positive or negative.

Life is too important to be taken as a joke, but too ridiculous to be taken seriously.

The celebrity world can be so ugly. Everyone seems to have slept with everyone else and it's some sort of strange weird cycle. I don't want to get into that.

We have, unlike many of our competitors, continued to meet our various financial obligations.

Let the clock and the earth do their own thing... Let the comings and goings of life continue... But YOU stay HERE and NOW. This exercise is to bring you to the Eternal Present where it all is.

In religion, it is not the sycophants or those who cling most faithfully to the status quo who are ultimately praised. It is the insurgents.

The gospel is not about choosing to follow advice; it's about being called to follow a King.

Let not our proposal be disregarded on the score of our youth.