Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.

The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

Never regret anything that made you smile.

All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.

Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.

Life is short, Break the Rules. Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly. Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably And never regret ANYTHING That makes you smile.

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.

Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.

If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed.

The head can travel a far piece while the body sits in one spot. It can traverse many decades, and many conversations can be had, even with the dead.

I've always believed that there are funny people everywhere, but they're just not comedians. In fact, some of my best comedic inspirations were not professional entertainers.

You definitely have to do other things when you know your shot isn't falling. You can't just depend on knocking down the three-ball.

In no instance is there to be a musical or opera of Inherit the Wind because it doesn't sing. It's an intellectual play.

I want to show that I can pitch well and get along with the guys in the locker room.'

The church has no authority to preach of inclusivity if we fear altering the look of our church by bringing in the poor.

A dance is the devil's procession, and he that entereth into a dance, entereth into his possession.

I wouldn't. I would just go home. I'd fake an injury or something.

Common sense is in spite of, not as the result of education.

I'm motivated by fear. Fear of fear. I hate being scared to do something. And I think what developed in my early days was the attitude that I started attacking things that I was scared of.