Hell hath no fury like a frustrated fundamentalist whose God condemned him to "hell" for having "impure thoughts."

What do you call a comedian who runs for president? A trump card.

Trump appeals to right-wingnuts because when the going gets tough, they wig out.

Did evangelical Christians mistake Donald Trump's hairpiece for a halo, while ignoring the obvious signs that he worships Mammon?

Donald Trump has taken the Peter Principle to unprecedented heights. Or is it depths?

If brevity is the soul of wit then brevity and levity are the whole of it.

It's not that every leaf must finally fall, it's just that we can never catch them all.

Trump appeals to the disaffected by loudly trumpet-ing what they want to hear: other people are always the problem, and the solution is to either put them in their proper place or get rid of them.

Many presidents have believed in God, but Donald Trump evidently believes that he is God.

Teddy Roosevelt spoke softly and carried a big stick; Donald Trump speaks loudly and carries a big shtick.

It's simply not true that Donald Trump has no experience in foreign affairs. Hell, two of his foreign affairs resulted in marriages!

'The war in Iraq - if Osama was a Christian - it's the Christmas present he never would have expected.

If I do continue to have the opportunity to work in Iran, that's very much what I'd prefer to do.

A noble spirit embiggens the smallest man.

You can sing all you want about how you love Jesus, you can have crocodile tears in your eyes, but the consecration that doesn't reach your purse has not reached your heart.

Rapidity does not always mean progress, and hurry is akin to waste. The old fable of the hare and the tortoise is just as good now, and just as true, as when it was first written.

You can find out a lot sitting in the barber's.

Will ye come with me?” he whispered. And she answered without hesitation. “Yes, please.

That is to say that despair does not seem to be in any way potentially to be productive.

I set my star so high that I would constantly be in motion toward it.

Leaders understand the ultimate power of relationships.