Here is Heimel's Law: Anything you fantasize about won't come true. So just cut it out.

Dogs are us, only innocent.

If you can't live without me, why aren't you dead already?

There is a microscopically thin line between being brilliantly creative and acting like the most gigantic idiot on earth.

Dogs act exactly the way we would act if we had no shame.

Infidelity is such a pretty word, so light and delicate. Whereas the act itself is dark and thick with guilt, betrayal, confusion, pain, and (okay) sometimes enormous pleasure.

Never judge someone by who he's in love with; judge him by his friends. People fall in love with the most appalling people.

A person who uses party as a verb is a person who will walk into a shop and walk out wearing a rubber jumpsuit.

Friends are the twenty-first-century version of extended families.

we know that our world is corrupt and diseased but we're tired of being cynical and feeling helpless. What the hell, tilt at a windmill.

Show me a woman who is prouder of her clean kitchen than of her collection of lingerie and I'll show you a woman with enlarged pores.

Your mind will serve you better than any trinket under the suns...It is a weapon...and like any weapon, you need practice to be any good at wielding it.

Excessive bail shall not be required, nor excessive fines imposed, nor cruel and unusual punishments inflicted. - Eighth Amendment, United States Constitution

It is not only the most difficult thing to know oneself but the most inconvenient one too.

The students in your youth ministry don’t need your clever ideas and great programming skills. They need a living model—a man or woman of God who is passionate about his or her faith.

There's no one way to dance. And that's kind of my philosophy about everything.

History is the only laboratory we have in which to test the consequences of thought.

Terrorism is an evil that threatens all the countries in Europe. Vigorous cooperation in the European Union and worldwide is crucial in order to meet this evil head on.

Developing expertise or assets that are not easily copied is essential; otherwise you're just a middleman.

If you're not nervous, it means you don't care.