Hey man, can you talk to dolphins and pilot whales with that huge forehead of yours?

I am Shiva, Destroyer of Worlds.

The devil doesn't come dressed in a red cape and pointy horns. He comes as everything you've ever wished for.

You show me a truly funny girl who doesn't have emotional issues, and I'll introduce you to my stable of unicorn thoroughbreds ridden by leprechaun jockeys.

Men will treat you the way you let them. There is no such thing as 'deserving' respect; you get what you demand from people.

The great stories go to those who aren't afraid to live them

You ever wake up in the middle of the night because a couple of cats are clawing each other to death outside your window? That's what it's like listening to you speak.

I will never understand why people get so upset at things I don't even remember saying.

I laugh at people who say things like 'I'm a good person, I just do bad things.' No, that's not how it works. What you do IS who you are.

The hardest lesson I've had to learn in my life is that my intelligence is inversely correlated to my humility. The more I thought I knew, the less I actually knew.

The narcissist act is not an act. I actually am a narcissist, very much so. My world revolves around me.

You could do a lot worse.

My wandering has led me to the beginning of our journey together. I suppose it's only fitting for me to be here at that journey's end.

Love is a natural feeling, hatred is an acquired one.

Be who you are, nobody likes to be copied!

When they talk of ghosts of the dead who wander in the night with things still undone in life, they approximate my subjective experience of this life.

I tell everyone a different story. That way nothing's ever boring, even when they turn and say goodbye.

I got a really thick strong accent. I'm a nerd, nah not really, I'm goofy. You have to know me. You'll see it, people who know me see it.

All my writing has been an effort to sort out the paradoxes of my life.

I wish we could treat our bodies as the place we live from, rather than regard it as a place to be worked on, as though it were a disagreeable old kitchen in need of renovation and update.

I learned to love dance for its own sake.