Hey wedding DJ, there is no way in hell I'm paying you $1, 000 when all you're doing is plugging your iPod into the sound system #AHOLE

If there is anything good about nobility it is that it enforces the necessity of avoiding degeneracy

I'm pretty easy going, I think.

Reasons why members of Congress deserve a pay raise: Many big corporations are cutting back on bribes; nearly half the members have never been indicted.

The founder brought the laws from the lawgiver; the faithful are meant to announce the laws to the lawgiver.

Sarah Palin is treated like a bimbo sometimes, but she has never given the public the respect they deserve. She acts silly and doesn't know stuff. She didn't even finish her term.

Today, it is a reality.

I want to be remembered as someone who was sincere. Even if I made mistakes, they were made in sincerity. If I was wrong, I was wrong in sincerity.

I've killed my soul by playing the victim.

Even in the wildest storms the sky is not all dark; and so in the darkest dealings of God with His children, there are always some bright tokens for good.

I am quite correctly described as 'more of a sponge than an inventor....'