Hi, well soon return you to the dyslexic production of Bitty Bitty Chang Chang.

I'm handsome, no ands, buts or ifs.

We all have a dinosaur deep within us just trying to get out.

Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people, one person will always disagree with the other nine!

For as long as I can remember, I've had memories.

Wives live longer than husbands because they're not married to women.

Did you know that..........'embargo' spelled backwards is 'o grab me

This just in: Beverly Hills 90210, Cleveland Browns 3.

Give me liberty! Or a bran muffin!

Our top story tonight: Famous TV dolphin flipper was arrested today on prostitution ring charges. He allegedly was seen transporting two 16 year olds across state line for immoral porpoises.

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury. It's not like the sheep was underage.

I think filmmakers want their movies to be seen.

Don Knotts left [Andy Griffith Show] to pursue a movie career, so once he was gone I left too.

When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up?” (…) A sigh of longing. “To be honest, I wanted to be ruler of the entire world. Or the ruler’s trophy wife.

Almost always, when I'm on TV, the producers who call me, who negotiate what we're going to say, is a woman.

Hospitality should have no other nature than love.

Love knoweth no laws.

The art of prophecy is very difficult, especially with respect to the future.

My mother is still battling alcoholism.

Never use the passing years as an excuse for old age.

How did I get hooked? Well, it's something like you journalists having a drink after work