Hilarious, dude. You should, like, have your own show.

I don't like lollipops.

Artemis Fowl will never be secondary." "I thought you were Artemis Fowl the Second?" said Holly.

Butler could kill you a hundred different ways without use of his armoury. Though I'm sure one would be quite sufficient.

I hear that you were on a date with Trouble Kelp. Are you two planning on building a bivouac any time soon?

Either that boy is the sanest creature on Earth, he thought, or he is so disturbed that our tests cannot even begin to scratch the surface.

Have you ever heard of the theory of relativity?" Artemis blinked. "Is this a joke? I have traveled through time, Doctor. I think I know a little something about relativity.

Butler was seeing the world as it was, complete with L.E.P retrival team

Being in command means making tough decisions. Not being in command means shutting up and doing what you're told. --Artemis Fowl

I never tell anyone exactly how clever I am. They would be too scared.

It's like learning to ride a unicorn. You never forget.

Chocolate cured just about everything, but being a crocodile's chew-toy was on a whole other level.

Love is a sacred reserve of energy it is like the blood of spiritual evolution.

The more comfort the less courage there is.

I had a hard time at Chelsea mainly because I was injured much of the time. Every time I recovered from one injury I seemed to get a new one and it set me back again.

Don't be afraid to ask people 'why,' 'what if.' Don't be afraid to attack your career. Get in the game, don't stay on the sidelines.

But, dear God, don't listen to me. I'm an old lady in the middle of nowhere without a real toilet.

Do not try to be special. If you are simply ordinary, more ordinary than others, you will become extraordinary.

And yet shall Love himself be heard,Though long deferred, though long deferred:O'er the modern waste a dove hath whirred:Music is Love in search of a word.

We're prosperous enough that we can afford to have one in six able-bodied men of working age sitting at home playing video games.

Fame is not like a jacket. You can't put it on and then take it off.