Hillary Clinton is, I think, a cult figure.

If Thomas Jefferson thought taxation without representation was bad, he should see how it is with representation.

Poverty is not the root cause of crime.

Liberals attempt through judicial activism what they cannot win at the ballot box.

We're not sexists, we're chauvinists - we're male chauvinist pigs, and we're happy to be because we think that's what men were destined to be. We think that's what women want.

End results that work that don’t involve government threaten liberals.

You know why there's a Second Amendment? In case the government fails to follow the first one.

Styrofoam and plastic milk jugs are biodegradable! Do you know what isn't biodegradable? Paper!

I think cigars are just a tremendous addition to the enjoyment of life.

The NAACP should have riot rehearsal. They should get a liquor store and practice robberies.

In a country of children where the option is Santa Claus or work, what wins?

Jesus doesn’t take sides; He takes over.

Happiness is not merely money, which is fun for effort and achievement

The rational man finds that his share of the cost of the wastes he discharges into the commons is less than the cost of purifying his wastes before releasing them.

I don't mind aging. I mean, my whole thing is, it's just a privilege to age.

Having disciples is in the end like having children, only not with love but with self-love preeminent.

I found Elvis on the Internet, I went camping with a young cadet, he showed me his bayonet.

I don't want to put my fate in country music fans; I'm too stubborn.

Im involved in the stock market, which is fun and, sometimes, very painful.

Perhaps 'tis pretty to force together Thoughts so all unlike each other; To mutter and mock a broken charm, To dally with wrong that does no harm.

It must be the body. It's chiseled out of marshmallows.