His nerve, his memory, and I can't remember the third thing.

My swing is so bad I look like a caveman killing his lunch.

Pressure is playing for ten dollars when you don't have a dime in your pocket.

Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a bagpipe.

You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work.

I'm going to win so much money this year, my caddie will make the top twenty money-winners list.

The older I get, the better I used to be.

You're Mexican until you make money and then you're Spanish.

I'm not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they'd come up sliced.

If you are caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can hit a 1-iron.

There are two things you can do with your head down - play golf and pray.

Like the sun, a teacher enlightens a mind with his love, warmth, and light.

It is one thing to be gifted and quite another thing to be worthy of one's own gift.

I seemed to have lost all soul or sensation but for this one pursuit.

To achieve big things you have to have big dreams.

To a commonplace man of limited intellect, for instance, nothing is simpler than to imagine himself an original character, and to revel in that belief without the slightest misgiving.

For too much rest becomes a pain.

Mutual tolerance is a necessity for all time and for all races.

Naruto: BELIEVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!

In art intentions are not sufficient and, as we say in Spanish, love must be proved by deeds and not by reasons. What one does is what counts and not what one had the intention of doing.