Hitler never bothered with restaurant reservations; he just dropped by. And somehow they always found him a table.

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me . . they’re cramming for their final exam.

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.

All the media and the politicians ever talk about is things that separate us, things that make us different from one another

Don’t just teach your children to read… Teach them to question what they read. Teach them to question everything.

In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem.

Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.

There is a planet named Pluto, but we don't have one named Goofy. Goofy would be a good name for this planet. It certainly qualifies.

In light of heaven, the worst suffering on earth, a life full of the most atrocious tortures on earth, will be seen to be no more serious than one night in an inconvenient hotel.

Nothing's going to change if you're just thinking about it. No matter how much you worry about someone else's problems.... you can't fix it for them.

O who would trust this world, or prize what's in it, That gives and takes, and chops and changes, ev'ry minute?

Man is to be found in reason, God in the passions.

I obviously prefer writing novels but I take my journalism very seriously, and I enjoy doing it between novels. It gives me an opportunity to move in the outside world.

The things I learned from the army - and I think it was a lesson for life - was how to work in unison with other people. How to take responsibility.

After you get a season under your belt, you learn a lot of lessons. It's a much bigger challenge, logistically, in terms of production.

Traditional nationalism cannot survive the fissioning of the atom. One world or none.

By giving every American access to quality, affordable health care, they will create a more competitive, a stronger and more secure America!