Hookers have to deliver on their promise... unlike politicians.

I won't eat anything that has intelligent life, but I'd gladly eat a network executive or a politician.

You offer a sincere compliment on a great mustache and suddenly she's not your friend.

Money can't buy poverty.

Could be worse... Could be raining

Too old to die young, and too young to grow up.

I don't enjoy anything while I'm doing it. I enjoy having done things, though.

Comedy, like sodomy, is an unnatural act.

I don't know any jokes, which is embarrassing. I wish I did.

I don't want to be a director. I want to direct. There's a difference.

He made us laugh, he took my pain away. I love you, Lauretta.

Be kind to everyone; forgive everyone everything.

Don't worry about telling your actor what to do.

In their meditations, the high priests and priestesses of Atlantis had seen that the Atlantean civilization was going to end cataclysmically.

Why should not a poet's cat be winged as well as his horse?

I recommend it to all people: Get down on the floor and look at the world from where the child looks at it.

The diagram of the house is a portrait of the family, a true portrait, whether it's sad or happy.

Every step is on the path.

The invitation to repent is rarely a voice of chastisement but rather a loving appeal to turn around and to “re-turn” toward God.

Mother is a verb, not a noun.

Only what we have wrought into our character during life can we take with us.