How come abbreviated is such a long word?

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese

You can't have everything. Where would you put it?

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?

I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.

If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?

The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, 'Where the hell is my roof?

If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong?

Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.

There is nothing more truly artistic than to love people.

Be a yardstick of quality. Some people aren't used to an environment where excellence is expected.

If we did all the things we are capable of, we would literally astound ourselves.

I don't think there's an improvised word in the movie. I hope not because I admire writing. Improvising is kind of gambling. It's just that you're standing up.

I regard remaking a film as creating something again.

When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun.'

Love is the word used to label the sexual excitement of the young, the habituation of the middle-aged, and the mutual dependence of the old.

Love is healing. Love is comforting. Love is holy. Food can be all those things, too.

I like fighters. That's why I love Russ Feingold. I love Barbara Boxer. And Howard Dean and John Conyers. Democrats I talk to around the country want their leaders to come out and fight for them.

There is nothing serious in Mortality