"How could you think of such awful things?" liberal critics always ask. "How else could I possibly amuse myself?" I always wonder.

It wasn't until I started reading and found books they wouldn't let us read in school that I discovered you could be insane and happy and have a good life without being like everybody else.

Don’t sleep with people who don’t read.

My idea of an interesting person is someone who is quite proud of their seemingly abnormal life and turns their disadvantage into a career.

True success is figuring out your life and career so you never have to be around jerks.

Without obsession, life is nothing.

[My catholic education] sticked with me. It caused the rage I had to make 'Pink Flamingos.'

Being rich is not about how much money you have or how many homes you own; it's the freedom to buy any book you want without looking at the price and wondering if you can afford it.

Do we secretly idolize our imagined opposites, yearning to become the role models for others we know we could never be for ourselves?

I like hard movies; I like ones that are basically the opposite of a date movie.

The "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" hitchhiker really made people never want to hitchhike again - the hitcher, the show. Hitchhiking is always vaguely sexual.

Be like a postage stamp. Stick to it until you get there

Don't let what you fear stop you from pursuing it. For the most part, what you fear doesn't even know that you are afraid of it.

Go be who you were meant to be, explore your mind, understand you are free.

...victory does not come to men who listen to their fears.

Nothing is permanent," Magnus said. "I know this from experience. But you can get new things. You can meet new people. You can go on.

Enlightenment is not a finite state. It's not something that you just do and it's done. It goes on forever.

Success isn't supposed to happen, no matter how hard you work. There's no guarantee you're going to succeed. There's nothing set in stone.

Good intentions do not guarantee good results. Somehow Andrew Keates turns works of merit into evenings of entertainment. Don't call him a dramaturge, call him an alchemist.

Nature is the time-vesture of God that reveals Him to the wise, and hides him from the foolish.

The humble, meek, merciful, and just are everywhere of one religion; and when death has taken off the mask they will know one another, though the diverse liveries they wear here make them strangers.