How did an allegedly free people spawn a vast, rampant cuttlefish of dominion with its tentacles in every orifice of the body politic?

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible.

Mercedes Benz : A mechanical device that increases sexual arousal in women.

Tabasco sauce is to bachelor cooking what forgiveness is to sin.

A firm, hearty handshake gives a good first impression, and you'll never be forgiven if you don't live up to it.

At the core of liberalism is the spoiled child — miserable, as all spoiled children are, unsatisfied, demanding, ill-disciplined, despotic and useless. Liberalism is a philosophy of sniveling brats.

There's a whiff of the lynch mob or the lemming migration about any overlarge concentration of like-thinking individuals, no matter how virtuous their cause.

Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death very carefully to your child. This will make threatening him with it much more effective.

Watching Republicans in Washington is like watching lemmings, if lemmings jumped into cesspools instead of off cliffs. Splash! There goes Mark Foley!

Authority has always attracted the lowest elements in the human race

It's unexpectedly painful to have become a pronoun.

I've often noticed that we are not able to look at what we have in front of us, unless it's inside a frame.

I usually have more than one thing I'm working on at once - I've been working on three different novels. When I get stuck on one, I hop back and forth.

I remember a time when everybody I loved hated me because I hated them.

You need to take a long, hard look in the mirror and not come away thinking, "Hey, there's something wrong with this mirror."

I remain unconvinced that anything other than rapid decomposition is the fate of my body and mind after death.

A modicum of discord is the very spice of courtship.

Even when she looked scared, she had a lot of guts.

I've always loved musical theater. It's a bit of a family tradition.

A party is the vanguard of a class, and its duty is to lead the masses and not merely to reflect the average political level of the masses.