How did it come to be that you think men and women are the same? Well, there's a simple answer to the question: Feminism.

If Thomas Jefferson thought taxation without representation was bad, he should see how it is with representation.

Poverty is not the root cause of crime.

Liberals attempt through judicial activism what they cannot win at the ballot box.

We're not sexists, we're chauvinists - we're male chauvinist pigs, and we're happy to be because we think that's what men were destined to be. We think that's what women want.

End results that work that don’t involve government threaten liberals.

You know why there's a Second Amendment? In case the government fails to follow the first one.

Styrofoam and plastic milk jugs are biodegradable! Do you know what isn't biodegradable? Paper!

I think cigars are just a tremendous addition to the enjoyment of life.

The NAACP should have riot rehearsal. They should get a liquor store and practice robberies.

In a country of children where the option is Santa Claus or work, what wins?

Ultimately, it's a sense of camaraderie and friendship with local people that is core to my journeys.

A happy childhood is the pledge of a ripe manhood.

I'd love to have a great relationship with my father. And unfortunately... I don't.

I think I've tried to stay true to my music since the beginning. It's kind of hard because of the access and technology but I just do what I do.

A government can be no better than the public opinion which sustains it.

there is only one thing we do know and that is that we do not know anything.

Touch a man who can't walk up right, and that lame man, he's gonna fly.

People in Finland have also adopted me because of my dad, and that's great, but it's the one language I can't speak.

A hypocrite is one who plays two parts consciously for his own ends. When we find fault with other people we may be quite sincere, and yet Jesus says in reality we are frauds.

To be No. 1 on the 'New York Times' best-seller list, well, that's alarming. Having been a stand-up comedian, I think it's surprising to a lot of people that I had the insight I had.