How do I get to Carnegie Hall? Practice. Practice. Practice.

I don't deserve this award, but I have arthritis and I don't deserve that either.

My wife Mary and I have been married for forty-seven years and not once have we had an argument serious enough to consider divorce; murder, yes, but divorce, never.

Age is something that doesn't matter, unless you are a cheese. Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

No matter how often I tell people I'm thirty-nine some of them refuse to believe I'm that old.

A rich man is one who isn't afraid to ask the salesperson to show him something cheaper.

Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

It's not so much knowing when to speak, when to pause.

A scout troop consists of twelve little kids dressed like schmucks following a big schmuck dressed like a kid.

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air.

I went to a meeting for premature ejactulators. I left early.

God’s desire is to reveal Himself to everyone, yet He will manifest Himself only to those who love Him.

Where You Hail From Isn't As Important As Who You Are and What You Do...Your Doings Define and Describe You.

Rational was for people who didn’t have a broken heart.

The team architecture means setting up an organization that helps people produce that great work in teams.

Rick Santorum beat Mitt Romney in three states on Tuesday. Got a huge amount of fundraising. That's the good news for Rick Santorum. The bad news: people are now Googling 'Santorum.'

Bores put you in a mental cemetery while you are still walking.

Life is what comes along after you have planned something else.

I don't know what truculent means, but if it's good, it's me

Music is moral law. It is the essence of order and leads to all that is good, true and beautiful.

Good clothes open all doors.