How do we know for sure that no two snowflakes are the same - we haven't got anybody watching.

Here in Hollywood you can actually get a marriage license printed on an Etch-A-Sketch.

The radical right is so homophobic that they're blaming global warming on the AIDS quilt.

Washington, DC is to lying what Wisconsin is to cheese.

The easiest job in the world has to be coroner. Surgery on dead people. What's the worst thing that could happen? If everything went wrong, maybe you'd get a pulse.

We need anything politically important rationed out like Pez: small, sweet, and coming out of a funny, plastic head.

You've got bad eating habits if you use a grocery cart in 7-Eleven.

Maybe democrats will eventually turn on Obamacare when they realize you might need a photo I.D. to participate in the program.

Xenophobia doesn't benefit anybody unless you're playing high-stakes Scrabble.

There is a chalk outline slowly being drawn around common sense and most people can't identify the victim.

It's foolish to be prejudiced. There are so many reasons to hate people on an individual basis.

Everyday there will be an opportunity to Frown or to Smile, to Drown or to Dance, to be Sad or to be Glad. It's a Choice!

Leave me alone in the long desert forever, and I won’t give up on my dreams.

The principle was right there-you couldn't miss it. The more you did for your customers the more they did for us.

Actors are professionals who deal with people's emotions and their thoughts.

There are performers who have built their whole career doing magic on TV and can't really perform live at all - don't really have jobs and skills.

I learn it every day of my life, learn it with pain I am grateful for: patience is everything!

I’m really alive! he thought. I never knew it before, or if I did I don’t remember!

The shaman has access to a superhuman dimension and a superhuman condition, and by being able to do that he affirms the potential for transcendence in all people. He is an exemplar, if you will.

When you are satisfied, you are successful. For that's all there is to success is satisfaction.