How many Republicans does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to mix the martinis, one to change the light bulb, and one to reminisce about how good the old one was.

That's the beauty of argument, if you argue correctly, you're never wrong.

How many times had those awful words - "I know what I'm doing" - been uttered throughout history as prelude to disaster?

The best advice on writing I've ever received was from William Zinsser: 'Be grateful for every word you can cut.'

E-mails are the new herpes: You never get rid of them.

Christopher Hitchens is the greatest living essayist in the English language.

Nothing raises the national temperature more than a VACANCY sign hanging from the colonnaded front of the Supreme Court.

Who needs evidence when you've got the Internet?

Oil they would buy from anyone. From Satan.

The vice-president's tongue is several time zones ahead of his brain.

I think that every man is afraid of his wife.

I'm not afraid of being dead. I'm just afraid of what you might have to go through to get there.

To fill our lives with joy, the morning sun touches our hearts with the warmth of her kindness and the light of her love. Let us be like the sun touch someone’s life with kindness every morning.

I've been thinking of installing a train in my house. It could bring me shrimp crackers from the kitchen.

The body is our general medium for having a world.

The dimples spread across his face again and Megan couldn’t help but melt a little

The tourist may complain of other tourists, but he would be lost without them.

Nothing in science has any value to society if it is not communicated, and scientists are beginning to learn their social obligations.

Education isn't something you can finish

Newt correctly assumes that the American public is beginning to look down the road and at least distinguish the landmarks on either side and know where it wants go. We have a chance to lead it there.

Lots of people say it's the song. For me, it's not always the song - there's something bigger: the spirit of an artist.