How many amoebas does it take to screw in a light bulb? One, no two! No four! ...no eight!

In Unity there is strength; We can move mountains when we're united and enjoy life - Without unity we are victims. Stay united.

Hitler was a vegetarian. Just goes to show, vegetarianism, not always a good thing. Can in some extreme cases lead to genocide.

Add a drop of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it.

Contentment is knowing you're right. Happiness is knowing someone else is wrong.

Three blokes go into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.

I'm English and as such I crave disappointment. That's why I buy Kinder Surprise.

Orchestras have often been used to conjure up the natural world: Swans, sharks, trout, but not, as far as I know, the often maligned jellyfish.

The day after tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life - that way you've always got a couple of days in hand.

Tonight's show is about doubt. Or maybe it isn't - haven't made my mind up yet.

Three women walk into a pub and say, 'Hooray, we've colonised a male-dominated joke format'

Never let your Enemies become your Advocates.” by A. K. Hasan

All gardeners live in beautiful places because they make them so.

I'm okay. Russian machine never breaks.

It would be about as easy for an American to become a Chinaman or a Hindoo as for him to acquire an Englishness or a Frenchness or a European-ness that is more than half skin deep.

It won't be long before another day, were gonna have a good time. And no ones gonna take that time away. You can stay as long as you like

And now without redemption all mankind Must have been lost, adjudged to death and hell By doom severe.

Those huckleberries in the National League don't want to do anything that the American League wants to do.

The typical modern has the look of the hunted.

What we seek in the end is not unconditional love but a love for which we, uniquely in all the world, meet all the conditions.

Never give up! There's always hope because there's always help