Humility is the embroidery of chiefs.

An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.

We hope that, when the insects take over the world, they will remember with gratitude how we took them along on all our picnics.

The eagle may soar; beavers build dams.

The US has not imposed democracy in Yemen, its people have.

The whale is endangered, while the ant continues to do just fine.

Even pearls are dark before the whiteness of his teeth.

Money won't buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem.

Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve. Middle age is when you're forced to.

Now that women are jockeys, baseball umpires, atomic scientists, and business executives, maybe someday they can master parallel parking.

The government is shutting down the coal industry, they say it's cheaper to draw nuclear power off the French grid and cheaper to buy coal from Colombia.

Follow your dreams Bailey. Be they Harvard or somehing else entirely. No matter what that father of yours says, or how loudly he might say it. He forgets that he was someone's dream once, himself

There are only three rules in life. Traffic is real, Fire Burns and You Cannot Fly

Oh... I just leave it......Words have as much weight as trying to jump from the 123333333334 Floor without a parachute and to be alive.

Like hunting for a dead beloved's face among the living, in places, we find the place we loved before.

The surest way of achieving your goal is through the single-minded pursuit of simple actions.

Everything we do, our entire interior monologue, is prayer.

Television is to news as bumperstickers are to philosophy.

I want to keep audiences off balance, so they don't know who I am or how to take me. If I duck and weave, as Frank Bruno might say, I'll have a longer shelf life.

The next few years is really going to be focused on shoes.

I figure no matter how old you are, it's always going to be your first marriage and no life experience is going to make you a better judge of who you should marry.