I Xeroxed my watch. Now I have time to spare.

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese

You can't have everything. Where would you put it?

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?

I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.

If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?

The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, 'Where the hell is my roof?

If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong?

Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.

An accessible introduction to the nature of political thought. Just what I always wanted.

I can't afford to say yes to all my staff's desires, but one thing is certain – I can't afford the outrageous cost of not listening to their requests.

He that confesseth not that Jesus has come in the flesh and sent Joseph Smith with the fullness of the Gospel to this generation, is not of God, but is anti-christ

As you read the Word of God today, read it with expectancy and anticipation for the changes it will make in you.

Well I am afraid that I am going to die, because I have just put a down payment on a house.

We tried many times before to speed on the social revolution in Spain; attempted to stir up the feelings of the people and to raise the banner of Libertarian Communism.

Death has no need to be cruel, taking people's lives is more than enough.

Making and cheerfully keeping our covenants gives validity and life to the vital sacred and saving ordinances we need to receive in order to obtain all that the Father hath.

I always felt like I was a freak when I was growing up and that there was something wrong with me because I couldn't fit in anywhere.

If you innovate broadly, focus on the customer experience, and deliver everyday a great product, you will gain share.