I almost feel like I'm unoffendable now. I can roll with whatever.

The baby will talk when he talks, relax. It ain't like he knows the cure for cancer and just ain't spitting it out.

If it's not bourbon or sweatpants, it's going in the garbage.... No, don't get creative. Now is not a creative time. Now is a bourbon and sweatpants time.

On Furnishing One's Home - Pick your furniture like you pick a wife; it should make you feel comfortable and look nice, but not so nice that if someone walks past it they want to steal it.

Los Angeles is like San Diego's older, uglier sister that has herpes.

I just want silence... Jesus, it doesn't mean I don't like you. It just means right now, I like silence more.

Writing a book is incredibly pleasurable, but very solitary. You have total control, but sometimes that can drive you insane.

Why would you throw a ball in someone's face?...Huh. That's a pretty good reason. Well, I can't do much about your teacher being pissed, but me and you are good.

No, you can't go getting mad at people because they're shitty. Life will get mad at them, don't worry.

You go ahead. I'd rather not be shot out of a tube into a pool filled with a bunch of nine-year-olds' urine.

I was an angst-y journal writing kid.

Boredom is your mind and body’s way of telling you you’re not living up to your potential.

There is incredible generosity in the potentialities of Nature. We only have to discover how to utilize them.

Never mind a little dirt, if the goal is splendid!

Hi there," squeaked a precocious little voice, "you are speaking to Chloe Fusakawa, and I have just learned how to answer the phone.

I used to think that music was like lace upon a garment, nice to have but not necessary. I have come to believe that music is absolutely essential to our community life.

Many persons feel art, some understand it; but few both feel and understand it.

the modes of speech are scarcely more variable than the modes of silence.

Screenwriting is the most prized of all the cinematic arts. Actually, it isn't, but it should be.

The old emphasis upon superficial differences that separate peoples must give way to education for citizenship in the human community.

Every actor. every director, everybody needs an Oscar. You have to have that little statue in Hollywood or else you are nothing.