I always say, dare to struggle, dare to grin

Laughter is the valve on the pressure cooker of life. Either you laugh and suffer, or you got your beans or brains on the ceiling.

you aren't what you eat - you are what you don't poop.

We are all the same person trying to shake hands with our self.

We can make a difference and have fun doing it

Laughter is the valve on the pressure cooker of life.

we're all bozos on the bus, so might as well sit back and enjoy the ride.

Good morning! What we have in mind is breakfast in bed for four hundred thousand.

Sure, I could of done it different... put my clown in a closet and dressed up in straight clothing. I could of compromised my essence, and swallowed my soul.

Death was Patrick Henry's second choice.

And I also thought that Richard Nixon was the greatest political education we have ever had, but it looks like we need to relearn them again.

Good thing I'm aging, otherwise I'd be dead.

If you are going to start, don't quit. But if you are going to quit, don't even start!

Remember Obamacare is ready to explode.

A garden is a grand teacher. It teaches patience and careful watchfulness; it teaches industry and thrift; above all it teaches entire trust.

When a person is resolute [determined, sold out, dedicated, single-minded] in his faith and recognizes God's Presence everywhere, he is protected from all sides.

There is a time for some things, and a time for all things; a time for great things, and a time for small things.

I'd rather sit in bed and watch TV. All of my ex-boyfriends, of course, not Paris, would be like, 'What's the problem? You're so not sexual.'

To get asked to do stuff like 'United States Of Tara' and 'Caprica' is terrific. I can't complain.

I always tell other people to protect against the downside, and not risk roughing on new ventures, but I never stuck to that rule myself.

The thing about performance, even if it's only an illusion, is that it is a celebration of the fact that we do contain within ourselves infinite possibilities.