I am no longer married, so ladies... there you go.

Don't jack off a cactus, you'll only hurt your hand and the cactus' feelings

It's not how you pick your nose, it's where you put that booger that counts.

The one thing about Billie is he will snap and rip your head off if you point anything out at all other than how beautiful he is and how nice he looks today.

I wish people would turn off their computers, go outside, talk to people, touch people, lick people, enjoy each other's company and smell each other on the rump

Life is like breakfast: you just mix all ingredients 'cause in your stomach it will all come together.

Punk rock has become another viable art form. It always was. But now it's like everyone's doing it.

I've matured, maybe, but not grown up.

I'm not exactly sure how many kids I have, but yes, I do miss them officially, for the record. In case any of them are listening, I love you.

I'm a drummer. I can count to four and repeat.

I never completed high school and I am very rich and very successful.

We are on the threshold of a sea change in the agency business.

A terrorist can attack any time, any place using any technique and you can't defend everywhere against every technique at every moment.

Join me in the pure atmosphere of gratitude for life.

Your best player has to set a tone of intolerance for anything that gets in the way of winning

If being smart is what you say it is, I will remain a fool my entire life.

Children, old people, vagabonds laugh easily and heartily: they have nothing to lose and hope for little. In renunciation lies a delicious taste of simplicity and deep peace.

I think dreams can come true, but not necessarily like fairy-tales. It's not always so perfect like that.

You can always quit, so why quit now.

It seems to me to be important to distinguish a good idea from poor implementations of it

God has guarded His Word so that only the pure in heart can see its secrets. All other efforts will fail.