I am not Nostradamus.Nor would I want to be. I'm convinced being able to tell the future is the worst superpower. I'd rather be invisible and being invisible never ends well. Just read H. G. Wells!

My father is a liar and so am I. But I’m going to stop. I have to stop. I will tell you my story and I will tell it straight. No lies, no omissions. That’s my promise. This time I truly mean it.

A difference in self loathing? Please. The only difference between a gun and a rope is the time it takes to tie the knot.

The job of every generation is to discover the flaws of the one that came before it. That's part of growing up, figuring out all the ways your parents and their friends are broken.

Eating good food is my favourite thing in the whole world. Nothing is more blissful.

Zombies are the proletariat. Long live the workers!

When I was little, I made up my own fairy tales, and the ghostly echo of Once upon a time shapes all the fiction Ive ever written.

I give people If You Came Softly when they demand proof that novels for teens can be as good as the best novels for adults.

My favourite vampires are all very scary indeed. So the idea of falling in love with one is just weird to me.

In Australia we have a government actively undoing what little progress had been made on climate change and stripping money from all the important institutions such as the ABC, CSIRO and SBS.

I love blogging, even though apparently it's still dying, and hate it when I have too much going on to do so regularly.

The reason any person yaks excessively is because his communication is not being adequately acknowledged. He just keeps trying to be heard.

Human beings are consistent with regard to codes of honor, but endlessly fickle with regard to whom those codes apply. E.N. Wilson

I've never had a movie that got great reviews. I've had movies that got different levels of good and bad reviews, but you can more or less count on plenty of bad reviews.

I have a hard time imagining a country or a government where I would say, "Oh, this is good," where I could live under a government that I respect for a day or a week, even to see what it feels like.

butterflies were wind energy made visible.

Our individual life is brief, and perhaps the whole life of mankind will be brief if measured in astronomical scale

Someone ought to write a novel about me.

The avant-garde is to the left what jingoism is to the right. Both are a refuge in nonsense.

I lent a friend of mine $10,000 for plastic surgery and now I don't know what he looks like.

I think as a standup performer you have to feel the audience. So the audience kind of dictates what they get, you know?