I am putting real plums into an imaginary cake.

We all live in suspense, from day to day, from hour to hour; in other words, we are the hero of our own story.

Modern neurosis began with the discoveries of Copernicus. Science made men feel small by showing him that the earth was not the center of the universe.

Every age has a keyhole to which its eye is pasted.

Understanding is often a prelude to forgiveness, but they are not the same, and we often forgive what we cannot understand (seeing nothing else to do) and understand what we cannot pardon.

Every word she writes is a lie, including "and" and "the."

Bureaucracy, the rule of no one, has become the modern form of despotism.

If someone tells you he is going to make a 'realistic decision', you immediately understand that he has resolved to do something bad.

For self-realization, a rebel demands a strong authority, a worthy opponent, God to his Lucifer.

We are the hero of our own story.

Liberty, as it is conceived by current opinion, has nothing inherent about it; it is a sort of gift or trust bestowed on the individual by the state pending good behavior.

You're not going to be liked by everybody when you speak the truth. I don't speak the truth to put people down I don't speak the truth to show disrespect.

My scalp tingled like Christmas candy on a cold tongue.

Examples would indeed be excellent things were not people so modest that none will set, and so vain that none will follow them.

I just wrapped this movie called The Wedding Crashers which was a pretty big break for me.

The intellectual debility of contemporary conservatism is indicated by its silence on all important matters.

I believe in love at first sight for houses - but not for people.

Once you're in love, you have that excuse to go and do whatever you want.

I get freaked out by pills. Everyone I know is always like, "I'm just going to take a Valium or an Ambien on the plane." But I can't do any of that stuff - it scares me.

Once a human being has arrived on this earth, communication is the largest single factor determining what kinds of relationships he makes with others and what happens to him in the world about him.

The trick is, when there is nothing to do, do nothing.