I am told to just be myself, but as much as I have practiced the impression, I am still no good at it.

Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.

Cherish the friend who tells you a harsh truth, wanting ten times more to tell you a loving lie.

You can spend too much time wondering which of identical twins is the more alike.

What greater blessing to give thanks for at a family gathering than the family and the gathering.

Ever wonder what crime you committed that you are confined to a small enclosure above your sinuses, under permanent skull arrest?

If minutes were kept of a family gathering, they would show that "Members not Present" and "Subjects Discussed" were one and the same.

It finally happened. I got the GPS lady so confused, she said, "In one-quarter mile, make a legal stop and ask directions.

For the most part, we carnivores do not eat other carnivores. We prefer to eat our vegetarian friends.

On a windswept hill by a billowing sea, my destiny sits and waits for me.

It is not that love is blind. It is that love sees with a painter's eye, finding the essence that renders all else background.

When prayer goes viral, people are not excited about “it” (prayer) but are infectious about “Him

Jennifer where are you going, dear? Dinner will be ready in a minute. Your brothers found a few unattended five year olds.

The end of foreign occupation is one of the pre-requisites if we are to witness any progress in our efforts to help Iraq go forward.

What the Spanish War began the World War accomplished: America became the world's banker and ceased to be the world's pioneer!

We all got a hillbilly bone down deep inside.

Linus: It was a short summer, Charlie Brown. Charlie Brown: And it looks like it's gonna be a looong winter.

But you could miss me with all that, diss me then crawl back. I really wish yall would fall back, but gettin rich suppose to solve that.

I actually spend very little time listening to any new music.

The design industry is really pathetic.

I don't want to interact with people but I do get lonely.