I applied to Uncyclopedia Bassists, and was accepted!!

Rock stars come and go. Musicians play until they die.

To hell with the rules. If it sounds right, then it is.

If I can help a kid discover a liking, or even a passion for music in their life, then that’s a wonderful thing.

My son, Wolfgang, plays drums, guitars and bass.

It's always about the music, never about anything else.

Music kept me off the streets and out of trouble and gave me something that was mine that no one could take away from me.

You know, most people, they want to go to Hollywood. They want to be a star. They want to be a rock star. That thought never entered any of our minds, the Van Halen family.

When Van Halen started out, there was no path to fame. We just played what we liked. Even today it always comes down to the simplicity of rock and roll.

Imagine if Beethoven had a tape recorder. Then you'd know exactly what he meant. Maybe he meant 'Da da da da' instead of 'Boom boom boom boom!' Who knows?

Sometimes I just want to lick David Lee Roth in the nuts

Imagination is a place where all the important answers live.

I apologise, your Highness. Murder can be a painful business.

The obvious merits utterance. Character is f**king pertinent.

I would not like to see a person who is sober, moderate, chaste and just say that there is no God. They would speak disinterestedly at least, but such a person is not to be found.

Young people are just smarter.

Europe will get a stable and prosperous Turkey.

People make jokes about how black people are the first ones to be killed off.

One man's mistake is another man's opportunity.

Whenever you see me, I'm on antique quaaludes.

Men do not mirror themselves in running water - they mirror themselves in still water. Only what is still can still the stillness of other things.