I became blinded by what I thought I needed to do. I was wrong. I was stupid. But not for one minute did I ever stop loving you. And that's why I deserve to be forgiven.

The downward spiral of Dumbness in America is about to hit a new low.

Life has become immeasurably better since I have been forced to stop taking it seriously.

When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.

I learned a long time ago that reality was much weirder than anyone's imagination.

There is a road, no simple highway, between the dawn and the dark of night, and if you go, no one may follow, that path is for your steps alone.

Human beings are the only creatures on earth that claim a God and the only thing that behaves like it hasn't got one.

Sleep late, have fun, get wild, drink whisky and drive fast on empty streets with nothing in mind but falling in love and not getting arrested.

America... just a nation of two hundred million used car salesmen with all the money we need to buy guns and no qualms about killing anybody else in the world who tries to make us uncomfortable.

So we shall let the reader answer this question for himself: who is the happier man, he who has braved the storm of life and lived or he who has stayed securely on shore and merely existed?

Anything that gets your blood racing is probably worth doing.

I'd rather be a freak than a clone.

He was Lenin in a Lamborghini. He was Gandhi with a gun

I am in constant bliss, day and night, egotism has been dispelled from within me.

Thinking is trying to think the unthinkable: thinking the thinkable is not worth the effort.

If my baby don't love me no more, I know her sister will.

Girls just want to have fun. Well, so do old ladies!

Democrats - always standing up for what they later realize they should have believed in.

With rare exceptions, people are responsible for what they do.

Welcome, maids of honor, You doe bring In the spring, And wait upon her.

I will not write about anyplace in the world unless I've been there to personally research it