I believe in karma... that means i can do bad things to you all day long and assume you deserve it.

If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?

Remember there's no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a ripple with no logical end.

If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.

I love you like a fat kid loves cake!

The maintenance man is moving the thermostat in our office today. I started talking with him about the

Engineers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own problems.

You don't have to be a 'person of influence' to be influential. In fact, the most influential people in my life are probably not even aware of the things they've taught me.

Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.

Informed decision-making comes from a long tradition of guessing and then blaming others for inadequate results.

Life is half delicious yogurt, half crap, and your job is to keep the plastic spoon in the yogurt.

There are some things in life that we try to ignore, thinking that maybe if we don't see the problem, it won't see us when in reality, it's only getting bigger.

It is ... through the world of the imagination which takes us beyond the restrictions of provable fact, that we touch the hem of truth.

The pressures are intense, because the rewards for success and the penalty for failure are more and more.

What a misfortune it is that we should thus be compelled to let our boys schooling interfere with their education!

Transparency is not the same as looking straight through a building: it's not just a physical idea, it's also an intellectual one.

If I seem to boast more than is becoming, my excuse is that I brag for humanity rather than for myself.

I think it's the best thing I've ever done. I think it's realistic, and it's true to the me that has been developing over the years. I like first-person music.

This is my friend that we use a lot. Say hello to the trampoline.

There is no happiness until the mind is still. The cause of all sickness and sadness is the fluctuation of the mind.

I tell my friends married life is boring, but that's just a fun thing to say to make single people feel better.