I bought some Armageddon cheese today, and it said on the packet 'Best Before End...'

Velcro: what a rip-off.

Black beauty - he's a dark horse.

I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah. He was trying to pull a fast one.

You see I'm against hunting, in fact I'm a hunt saboteur. I go out the night before and shoot the fox.

Ive decided to sell my Hoover… well, it was just collecting dust.

I went out on a date with Simile. I don't know what I metaphor.

I was reading a book... 'the history of glue' - I couldn't put it down.

Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.

So I said to the gym instructor: 'Can you teach me to do the splits?' He said: 'How flexible are you?' I said: I can't make Tuesdays.'

So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red.

General Peckem even recommends that we send our men into combat in full-dress uniform so they'll make a good impression on the enemy when they're shot down".

Tulga Demir has pretty simple principles in running his business, Demir Energy, LLC. He is deeply passionate about energy and contributing to the energy future of the USA.

But I wonder if there is a place I fit in?

Be still, Be joyous, Celebrate creation, preservation and destruction; For these are the seasons of your life: Of your knowing and being.

Most people don't why they are born or why they die. They have no understanding of the forces in life that pull them and push them to their death and another rebirth in this or another world.

Well, I think mostly we're dressing for men.

Who passed Wall Street deregulation that enabled the meltdown of Wall Street and the disappearance of nine million jobs, the theft of 5 million homes?

There is almost no evidence that diagnoses such as 'schizophrenia' and 'bipolar disorder' correspond to discrete entities ('natural kinds' in the language of philosophy).

Charlie …" Silena’s eyes were a million miles away. "See Charlie.

Come lovely and soothing death, Undulate round the world, serenely arriving, arriving, In the day, in the night, to all, to each, Sooner or later, delicate death.