I built a career on negative reviews. I didn't get a good review ever until Fran Lebowitz gave me a good review in Interview. That was the first good review I got in 10 years.

It wasn't until I started reading and found books they wouldn't let us read in school that I discovered you could be insane and happy and have a good life without being like everybody else.

Don’t sleep with people who don’t read.

My idea of an interesting person is someone who is quite proud of their seemingly abnormal life and turns their disadvantage into a career.

True success is figuring out your life and career so you never have to be around jerks.

Without obsession, life is nothing.

[My catholic education] sticked with me. It caused the rage I had to make 'Pink Flamingos.'

Being rich is not about how much money you have or how many homes you own; it's the freedom to buy any book you want without looking at the price and wondering if you can afford it.

Do we secretly idolize our imagined opposites, yearning to become the role models for others we know we could never be for ourselves?

I like hard movies; I like ones that are basically the opposite of a date movie.

The "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" hitchhiker really made people never want to hitchhike again - the hitcher, the show. Hitchhiking is always vaguely sexual.

In the nearest future, those who understood the value of time will rule over those who trivialized time.

After the launch phase, your product is old news. Take advantage of the opportunity to generate interest when your product is new.

She promised to be good. She wasn't.

The best work and of greatest merit for the public has proceeded from the unmarried or childless men.

A zombie amusement park sounds like fun, but the health code violations alone are enough to turn your stomach.

Smoke like a chimney, work like a horse, eat without thinking, go for a walk only in really pleasant company.

When one is a stranger to oneself, then one is estranged from others, too.

Garden of Pain, I need you. What were the songs of beasts to the cries of sentient souls?

A story - with a message about praising what have rather than criticizing what haven't: There are some people who knock the pyramids because they don't have elevators!!!

Lennox Lewis, I'm coming for you man. My style is impetuous. My defense is impregnable, and I'm just ferocious. I want your heart. I want to eat his children. Praise be to Allah!