I can count all the lovers I've had on one hand...if I'm holding a calculator.

Being well-dressed gives a feeling of inward tranquility which psychoanalysis is powerless to bestow.

Unhappiness lies in that gap between our talents and our expectations.

A woman is supposed to have curves like an old Bentley, not like some old bike.

Self-pity is the most destructive of all narcotics.

I am not an intellectual. An intellectual is someone who looks at a sausage and thinks of Picasso, whereas I just say 'pass the mustard'.

People either hate me or dislike me - but I realized that people aren't against you, they are for themselves. We're all prejudiced in favor of ourselves.

The problem I've got is that I really, really like drugs. I love everything about them. It is horrific being sober all the time-utterly awful.

One of the many troubles of growing older is that it gets progressively harder to find a famous historical figure who hadn't yet amounted to anything by the time he was your age.

People are obsessed by happiness, but there are a lot of other invigorating experiences available.

But really death seems the least awful thing that can happen to someone

Company, you see - company is - is - it's a very different thing from solitude - an't it?

The nice thing about being a writer is that you can make magic happen without learning tricks.

I have had cardiomyopathy, which is a non-coronary condition and is in no way related to diet.

My reason nourishes my faith and my faith my reason.

I don't know of a soul who packed more living into 72 years than Charles Lindbergh did.

I truly believe the art's larger than the artist. Who cares about John Steinbeck? I care about the Joad family.

It's not Spring Break until somebody dies!

How poor, how rich, how abject, how august, How complicate, how wonderful, is man!... Midway from nothing to the Deity!

I want my teammates to understand that when No. 5 says something to you, that means it's very important because he doesn't talk a lot. If I'm saying something to you, it's going to help you.

I should be the face of Samuel Smith Beer. That'd be great.