I can hear the music all around me.

I'm always looking for meaningful one-night stands.

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it.

Volvo — they're boxy but they're good.

Not everyone who drinks is a poet. Some of us drink because we're not poets.

Music is the surest way of reaching someone else's heart.

Jaguar — For men who'd like hand-jobs from beautiful women they hardly know.

I wish I had a dime for every dime I have.

I am trapped in this body, and there is nothing I can do about it.

I certainly did feel inferior. Because of class. Because of strength. Because of height. I guess if I'd been able to hit somebody in the nose, I wouldn't have been a comic.

In the course of an average lifetime anyone growing up in a house with such a clock will hear the tune over a million times.

By all means, tell the cops about the crazy robot lady with the black leather body suit and the Kill Bill sword. Hope you like straitjackets.

I am giving an account of what was, not of what ought or ought not to be.

The minute you know you're on safe ground, you're dead.

Well, there's no guarantee of failure in life like happiness in high school.

Be fresh and new when perceiving the other. Always look for the highest first, look for the intrinsic beauty and goodness, for the essence of spirit in your partner.

Dear Basketball, From the moment I started rolling my dad's tube socks and shooting imaginary game-winning shots ... I fell in love with you.

People from outer space they come up to me, they don't look like Doctor Spock, they don't look like Klingons, all that Star Trek jive. They look like Elvis.

If they want to hang me, let them. And on the scaffold I will shout Freedom for the working class!

Commitment is not letting people down. That's very important in life. If you say you're going to do something, make sure you do it. Just try never to let people down.

So be patient. Do not compromise. And give your destiny time to find you.