I can no longer type, so I use TalkingPoint and Dragon Dictate. It's a speech-to-text program, and there's an add-on for talking which some guys came up with.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

True ideas seem to suffer from repetition, while stupid ones tend to flourish.

You and I were never meant to be together, but we are. Our pairing is not unlike two electrons ignoring natural laws in order to orbit one another. Life now defies reason—quirky but beautiful.

Conversation would be vastly improved by the constant use of four simple words: I do not know.

It's much easier to cheat than it is to be loyal. Everyone goes through down times. You just don't put yourself in those situations, you know?

An idea isn't worth that much. It's the execution of the idea that has value. If you can't convince one other person that this is something to devote your life to, then it's not worth it.

When we accept dismissive judgments of our community we stop having generous hope for it. We cease to be capable of serving its best interests.

All you have to do is believe, then you will see everything.

and in that instant, nothing else mattered. Not the song, not the place, not the other couples around him. Only this, only her.

Where the mind is without fear and the head is held high Where knowledge is free.

The long-continued and useful public service and eminent purity of character of the deceased ex-President will be remembered.