I can smell bullshit from a mile away but it's so much harder to detect when it's around you all day.

I'm a late-night guy.

I can always get better. A lot of my ex-girlfriends don't think I'm funny.

I don't laugh out loud at comics a lot.

Here's how you know that you're really drunk: when you get into a taxi cab and you think the fare is the time.

Losing my mind sounds so pessimistic. I prefer the term winning my insanity.

When people refer to 'Back in the Day,' it was a Wednesday. Just a little fun fact for you.

I'm quitting the business today. I'm going to open up an appliance store, I've always really been into toasters. I'm giving it all up.

I don't write any of my material down. I like to improvise and be spontaneous.

Trolls look for reasons to hate but really what they are mad at is the fact they are not included in anything ever.

In school I was pretty quiet. Kinda shy until my junior year. But at home I was a freak.

Friendship is the grease of life.

When we eat together, when we set out to do so deliberately, life is better, no matter what your circumstances.

Mathematicians deal with large numbers sometimes, but never in their income.

When I read a daring book or listen to rebellious music, I feel like I've found what freedom really means.

I mean, I feel like you get more bees with honey. But that doesn't mean I don't get frustrated in my life.

But hush! No telling to others that make so inquisitive questions. We must obey, and silence is a part of obedience, and obedience is to bring you strong and well into loving arms that wait for you.

Some record labels want to package you in a certain way and we didn't want that. Once the record company saw we had some substance and were not a one hit wonder. They got 100% behind us.

Donald Trump thinks belittling women makes him bigger. He goes after their dignity, their self-worth, and I don't think there is a woman anywhere who doesn't know what that feels like.

Behind all forms of beauty there is an infinite unity, and this unity, this intrinsic and eternal beauty, the artist is seeking to discern and to make others discern.

The day you think you have reached your fullest potential is the day that you havn't.