I can't believe in Christianity, but I think Jesus was a wonderful teacher.

Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes!

I've always wanted to go to Switzerland to see what the army does with those wee red knives.

My definition of an intellectual is someone who can listen to the William Tell Overture without thinking of the Lone Ranger.

A woman's mind is as complex as the contents of her handbag; even when you get to the bottom of it, there is ALWAYS something at the bottom to surprise you!

So, have you heard about the oyster who went to a disco and pulled a mussel?

Never trust a man, who when left alone with a tea cosey... Doesn't try it on.

There are two seasons in Scotland: June and Winter.

The desire to be a politician should bar you for life from ever being one.

I think age is terribly overrated. You're okay as long as you don't grow up. By all means grow old, but don't mature. Remain childlike, retain wonder, the ability to be flabbergasted by something.

Life is supposed to be fun. It's not a job or occupation. We're here only once and we should have a bit of a laugh.

You wake up one day and realise that your struggles and battles are your own and no one else ́s. And there is no one more capable to fight all the odds and enemies except you and you alone!

To get up in the morning & do the monumental tasks that face us, our labor is best fueled by love.

I'd do a show about garbagemen if it was good!

Every day I wake up and I really try to pinch myself to take advantage of today and to use that freedom of gesture to do what I really like to do.

The primary concern of the human animal is to avoid rejection and abandonment.

If clouds are blocking the sun, there will always be a silver lining that reminds me to keep on trying.

We must persuade Iran not t have nuclear weapons through peaceful and diplomatic means. We want a peaceful planet.

Dare to reach out your hand into the darkness, to pull another hand into the light.

This is your moment. Own it.