I'd put my faith in god, but I haven't met him, and I've been hurt before.

If I do marry, I'll expect a pretty serious dowry. I'm talking goats, pigs, chickens, the works.

Life is what you make of it, unless you have tourette's, in which case much becomes involuntary.

If space suits looked less like marshmallows, I'd be more interested in going to the moon.

Cupcakes are the tattooed brunette chick of the baked goods world.

Love is a crocodile just above the water line waiting to attack the innocent herbivore of my freedom.

Met someone who works at the zoo. Apparently the panda is a nasty animal.

Happiness is a carnival game. It's never as easy as it looks, but the dumb ones always seem to be walking around with a big stuffed animal.

It's a wonder you don't see the zebra being trotted out as a metaphor for racial harmony more often.

Every time I see a happy couple I want to give them a polygraph.

Insecurity is like herpes. It's not going anywhere. May as well learn to laugh at it.

Good neighbors always spy on you to make sure you are doing well.

The alchemy of diamonds from the rough is to mine every moment.

But I'm aware of the fact that I'm working in a commercial venue where I'm producing something that I wouldn't normally be approaching the way I'm doing it

I love having my hair and makeup done for red carpets, but to have that done every day would be exhausting.

The only thing I know about Slovakia is what I learned first-hand from your foreign minister, who came to Texas.

When I moved to New York, leggings were always a staple piece in my closet and I'm always with leggings, a T-shirt, a cool jacket and shoes cause that's what would be easier for me when I was a kid.

I don't do fad things or diets - they don't work.

Some, either from being glued to vice by a natural attachment, or from long habit, no longer recognize its ugliness.

I was disappointed over my dismissal, given that it was at a crucial stage of the game and I had worked very hard to get to that point,.

I remember writing a paper on human evolution in 1944, and I simply left Piltdown out. You could make sense of human evolution if you didn't try to put Piltdown into it.