I'd rather have a daughter in a whorehouse than a son in the police force,' Esther used to rage to anyone who would listen.

It wasn't until I started reading and found books they wouldn't let us read in school that I discovered you could be insane and happy and have a good life without being like everybody else.

Don’t sleep with people who don’t read.

My idea of an interesting person is someone who is quite proud of their seemingly abnormal life and turns their disadvantage into a career.

True success is figuring out your life and career so you never have to be around jerks.

Without obsession, life is nothing.

[My catholic education] sticked with me. It caused the rage I had to make 'Pink Flamingos.'

Being rich is not about how much money you have or how many homes you own; it's the freedom to buy any book you want without looking at the price and wondering if you can afford it.

Do we secretly idolize our imagined opposites, yearning to become the role models for others we know we could never be for ourselves?

I like hard movies; I like ones that are basically the opposite of a date movie.

The "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" hitchhiker really made people never want to hitchhike again - the hitcher, the show. Hitchhiking is always vaguely sexual.

Pride is a very dangerous disease that can turn your talent, asset, and achievements into a handicap.

I never think about what people are going think about me.

If I had a Volkswagon Beetle. I'd paint the front to resemble Glenn Langdon in War Of The Colossal Beast. Why? Two words: The Ladies.

There is not a single true chess-player in the world whose heart does not beat faster at the mere sound of such long beloved and familiar words as 'gambit games'.

We all need to go to good theater; that is what I believe will save it.

If you want to make an ordinary man happy, or think that he is happy, give him money, power, flattery, gifts, honours. If you want to make a wise man happy - improve yourself!

Jack Sprat could eat no fat,His wife could eat no lean. A real sweet pair of neurotics.

Everybody's trying to leave their mark on the world. That's why there's graffiti and babies.

It's quite an unfair thought that Microsoft are trying to control our gaming, they're trying to force us to be online all the time. [People] didn't really think that through.

I have decided that maybe I want to write when I grow up. I just don't know what I would write.