I'd rather you didn't talk, but it's up to you.

I terminated the interview when I didn't know what he was talking about and went upstairs to lunch.

I emphasise the following: don't, whatever happens, be anyone but yourself. Don't act anyone else - that would be fatal.

Many people think I'm a television personality. I never have been! Just someone who acts it.

You know this old style of American family series? Well, I sit there and cry.

I never, absolutely never, keep people waiting.

When my mother died, I had to go on air that night and do jokes.

It is no easy task to be good.

Life is a paradox. Every truth has its counterpart which contradicts it; and every philosopher supplies the logic his own undoing.

I didn't realize it, but the days came along one after another, and then two years were gone, and everything was gone, and I was gone.

In a hospital they throw you out into the street before you are half cured, but in a nursing home they don't let you out till you are dead.

My journey has been that of a character actor.

By disgracing and degrading the presidency of the United States, by fleeing the White House like a diseased cur, Richard Nixon broke the heart of the American Dream.

The brave view is that talking it out helps work it out. Maybe the realistic view is that talking it out inflames the issues further. But that is America, especially these days.

People think I hate the Royal Family, but that's not true.

Richard Pryor had real sincere and vulnerable moments. Now it seems so cheesy if you stop your act and say, "This is why we have to help them kids. We've got to make sure them kids can read."

Welcome evermore to gods and men is the self-helping man.