I deserve someone who likes me for who I am pretending to be.

I was high on life but eventually I built up a tolerance.

I'm not even worried about settling down. I think it's way too early. I'm 25 and I'm in show business. I mean, if things go well, my wife hasn't even been born yet.

I believe that if you go on a date and get to second base and then you go home alone and rub one out, that's like runs batted in.

I just got a new iPod. It's got 80 gigabytes. Because I like to jog for three weeks at a time and I do not want to hear the same song twice.

I'm in love with a philosophy major, and she doesn't even know I exist. And what's worse, she can prove it.

A woman is a highly developed, deeply intelligent, infinitely complicated being. And it needs to be carefully tricked into doing things.

I quit because I'm so tired of hearing bad news about cigarettes... Even if they discover good news, they don't publicize it - like the fact that smoking seriously reduces the risk of jogging.

I'm trying to feel terrified and alone. And regret every decision I've ever made, drenched in a cold sweat. It's called going to sleep. Maybe you've heard of it.

I hate all generalisations.

I never smoke grass and drive my car because, for one thing, no matter how many letters I write to the road commissions, they still refuse to start designing highways with second-chance exits.

The screen magnifies everything, even the way you are thinking.

A lie to get out of something, or take an advantage for oneself, that’s one thing; but a lie to make life more interesting—well, that’s entirely different.

The reality is that zero defects in products plus zero pollution plus zero risk on the job is equivalent to maximum growth of government plus zero economic growth plus runaway inflation.

Art should be serious, not a joke. I dont like to laugh about art.

It may not be too late, whatever happens, if our President, Lyndon Johnson, knew the truth from me. But if I am eliminated, there won't be any way of knowing.

While we cannot guarantee that we shall one day be first, we can guarantee that any failure to make this effort will make us last.

Every brain is wired differently from every other brain, and learns in ways unique to that wiring.

Nina knew the power of black and white images. Sometimes a thing was its truest self when the colors were stripped away.

Fortunately, when it comes to meat and poultry, I have the really wonderful situation of having producers and processors that produce and process a very high-quality product.

I'm always in range of a microphone. I even have a studio at home.