I didn't see any NRA officials killing babies in Waco.

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible.

Mercedes Benz : A mechanical device that increases sexual arousal in women.

Tabasco sauce is to bachelor cooking what forgiveness is to sin.

A firm, hearty handshake gives a good first impression, and you'll never be forgiven if you don't live up to it.

At the core of liberalism is the spoiled child — miserable, as all spoiled children are, unsatisfied, demanding, ill-disciplined, despotic and useless. Liberalism is a philosophy of sniveling brats.

There's a whiff of the lynch mob or the lemming migration about any overlarge concentration of like-thinking individuals, no matter how virtuous their cause.

Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death very carefully to your child. This will make threatening him with it much more effective.

Watching Republicans in Washington is like watching lemmings, if lemmings jumped into cesspools instead of off cliffs. Splash! There goes Mark Foley!

Authority has always attracted the lowest elements in the human race

Ensure that your daily chores, thought, actions, speeches and steps are taken with the purpose of giving you a good brand. Decide to be who God wanted you to be.

The timbre of his voice went into that low register that made my insides curl in on themselves--it was like my uterus was tapping out a happy dance on the rest of my organs.

Take time to gather up the past so that you will be able to draw from your experience and invest them in the future.

I have men in my life. I have a brother. So Maddox will have male teachers. I was raised without a father.

When you're wrong, you're wrong. But when you're right, you're wrong anyhow.

For the villainy of the world is great, and a man has to run his legs off to keep them from being stolen out fom underneath him.

If you can't feel grateful, if you're discouraged or depressed, then think of the fact that things could be a lot worse than they are.

Three people can keep a secret as long as two of them are dead.

Turning a human being into a thing is almost always the first step towards justifying violence against that person.

We’re all children of Kubrick, aren’t we? Is there anything you can do that he hasn’t done?