I do a lot of cultural material that's based on my traveling around the world. I basically just report what I've seen and where I've been.

Self-worth and financial worth become indistinguishable.

I don't make the stereotypes, I just see them.

If you're politically correct, chances are you're not coming to one of my shows. I get to go onstage and say things that everybody thinks all the time, but can't say out loud.

Indians are the second largest population in the world, but we're invisible on TV - everything is either black or white.

I DJ and I'm a harsh critic of DJs.

Stand-up and boxing are very similar. You're the only one out there, you're going into a fight, and you're going in with a game plan.

Azhar Usman is very funny, deeply spiritual, and extremely hairy. He's like Zach Galifianakis meets Deepak Chopra-and funnier than you'd expect that combination to be.

I'm not a media darling. I'm forever the outsider, for whatever the reason is.

Who I am on stage is just an amped up version of who I am in real life.

I love being a dad, and I'm a great dad.

With an enemy like that, who needs friends?

Well... "why" is a hard question to answer in any language.

The acceptance of death gives you more of a stake in life, in living life happily, as it should be lived. Living for the moment.

Health care costs are eating the Defense Department alive.

I read to my kid, but I can't stand reading.

Stillness within one individual can affect society beyond measure.

David Ortiz is an icon. He is one of a kind. But we'll do our best job to replace the offensive aspect, however we can.

A person might be able to play without being creative, but he sure can't be creative without playing.

Anyone who really loves you wants you to be authentic. And anyone who doesn't want you to be authentic doesn't really love you.

For the camera, particularly, I feel like - I think that, as human faces become older, they become more interesting.