I do think the patriotic thing to do is to critique my country. How else do you make a country better but by pointing out its flaws?

I have a problem with people who take the Constitution loosely and the Bible literally.

The reason I love my dog so much is because when I come home, he's the only one in the world who treats me like I'm the Beatles.

Let's face it; God has a big ego problem. Why do we always have to worship him?

The problem is that the people with the most ridiculous ideas are always the people who are most certain of them.

If you have a gun, you can rob a bank, but if you have a bank, you can rob everyone.

False hope really makes you cynical.

To a coward, courage always looks like stupidity.

It's not getting any better for the American people. It seems to be getting worse. That's predictable; education is a cycle. Stupidity breeds more stupidity.

You know what happens when windmills collapse into the sea? A splash.

Here's the thing about Donald Trump: He never apologizes. He's never wrong, no matter what crazy thing he says. He's totally - he's the white Kanye.

The lack of information is what makes one go to the desert in search of some seafood.

No one has a favorite book - they just fall in love with the spell the author put into the pages.

The ground will never complain how much weight you add on it, how much you dig it and how much you grow on it, How long you live on it. Unused ground is an abomination to nature.

I don't trust what this life has given me.

As I have said many times - my father was a great fan of Bill Dickey's and he certainly loved the Yankees. I hope that he would be pleased.

The age of the book is almost gone.

I'm not very good at taking compliments. It's better than getting slapped in the face, I suppose.

Almost everybody is enthusiastic about the promise of biotechnology to cure disease and to relieve suffering.

I'm a Ronald Reagan conservative. I'm an economic conservative, I'm strong military. But I also voice and speak and work hard on the social issues.

She's really gone, then. The little girl with the back of her shirt sticking out like a duck tail.